The Informed Nonsense of Johnny Zito

Flash! Mister and Misses America and All the Ships at Sea! Spoilers; this way!
Black Adam, sovereign ruler of Khandaq has been deposed. After committing acts of genocide around the world he was assassinated by a loose cabal of heroes backed by American forces on Chinese soil.
Victory in Asia; the Third World War has ended.
Adam’s […]

There’s nothing more epic than the fate of the world.
Ron Paul for President.
-Johnny Zito

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My worst habits are ones I conceived and nurtured myself.
This was Mel’s idea and my execution.
-Johnny Zito

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I spend about an hour a day randomly flipping through people’s MySpace profiles. Just invading their lives for a minute or two, acknowledging their existence and moving on.
If I were the President I would end the War on Terror, the War on Drugs and the War on Poverty… I’d start the MySpace Initiative instead.
I’d make […]

I try to make myself comfortable everywhere I go.
Unfortunately, I’m never at ease in cars. Or planes. Buses don’t really do it for me either.
“No, Baby, the road! Watch the road!” (above) encapsulates my angst and general distress while helplessly careening through city streets; where everyone believes themselves to be excellent drivers.
Special […]